Friday, April 30, 2010

Little One on facing demons

Little One has learned that some things are ok, even encouraged! While some things are generally frowned upon, and some are strictly forbidden. But you know, there are SO MANY things to classify into categories! And so many variables to consider.
Take the complex subject of hair bows. Is it, for example, never ok to eat your hair bow, or just not at home? How about in public? In the car? With a fox? On a box? If there are two hair bows per braid on a Sunday in June and a train leaves New York at 2pm, is it ok to eat only one?
There are a lot of parameters to define. But She has developed a system! When in doubt, draw attention to oneself. Then reach slooooowllly for the intended object/area, while watching for adult reactions. It will become immediately apparent whether one should: go ahead at leisure, change plans ASAP, or grab it really-quick! before someone takes it away.
This system has worked pretty well! Of course, like any scientist, She has to account for the random and verify results through duplication. Once She's certain, She's pretty good about avoiding the Forbidden Thing.
But She's still sometimes tempted. "Dishwasher buttons!" She thinks, staring up at them with a tumultuous heart, "Why must you tempt me with your shiny green light and smooth pressability?! I'm trying to toddle the straight and narrow!" They whisper promises of interesting noises and venting steam. But She tells the dishwasher (or busy street/outlet cover/jewelry box/other Forbidden Thing) that She's not falling for that doo-doo!
She puts one foot squarely in front of the other. She puts one hand on Her hip. She raises a pointed finger, sets Her brow to Steely Glare and scolds, "NO! No no no no nononononono NO!" If it's a first-degree tempt, like an open body of water, She throws in a stomp and some vigorous head shaking.
"That's right, Little One!", we say, "no dishwasher buttons!" Approval! Yes! This means She has won the battle and stayed out of time-out, despite the nefarious efforts of the Forbidden Thing!
So She smiles in victory, pokes Her finger out at Forbidden Thing one more time before walking off to play, and tells it, "HA."

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