Dressed for Success

She woke up extremely early and wouldn't go back to sleep.  She sat at my heels while I got ready, She picked at Her food and whined and sulked.  She stared me in the eyes while deliberately doing what She'd been told not to, and was shocked to find that even on the First Day of School, the rules apply as usual.  She was excused from breakfast and cried Her way upstairs.  She came back a few minutes later, calm and tear-streaked, and climbed into my lap.  She sat rocking gently with Her head on my shoulder while Her sister finished eating.  Her tummy hurt. 
But then She remembered something.  The dress.  The dress!
She raced upstairs and came back on tiptoe, arms out like a belle at a ball, with a sparkle in Her eye.
"Want to watch me spin this dress?!"
She spun and the skirt fluffed out to a glorious 180 degree angle to the floor, swishing and rustling around Her knees when She stopped. 
"This dress.  Is WONderful." She knew with complete certainty how to finish the look.  She combed Her hair and crested it with a sparkly rainbow princess crown.  She glammed up Her feet with jeweled sandals.  She donned the "most decorated ever" backpack. 
"Ready to go!"
A commute is new for us.  The drive there was time to reflect and worry.  She begged me to come with Her, to stay in class by Her side, or at least nearby, or at least in the corner of the room.  Not for a minute, all day.  She practiced asking the teacher if Mommy could please stay.  She clutched the backpack tight.  Adjusted Her crown. 
When we arrived the school was a zoo.  With one entrance for toddlers through middle schoolers, the melee at the door was overwhelming.  She shrank into Her backpack.  She held my hand. 
She saw Her teacher.  The teacher exclaimed over the dress. Little One beamed. Teacher greeted Her as if they were old friends and the warmth of her laugh visibly melted Little One's fear. 
We found Her hook and hung up the backpack.  We turned over the medical supplies and forms.  I wondered what would happen next, as I knelt down to Her level. 
"Have a great day today sweetie.  We love you so much!"
She threw Herself at me, and Her sister in my arms, and hugged us both so tight.  Then with a laugh She turned and flounced into the classroom. 
And that was it. 
Missy for Her part thought the whole thing very exciting.  She ate the special breakfast with oohs and aahhs.  She requested and proudly selected Her own fancy dress-dress, Her own crow'n.  She clapped as we headed out the door.  She posed grinning for pictures and followed Little One to the car crying "Go-go! Go-go!" She was thrilled with the noise and commotion of the school. 
She kissed Her big sister goodbye and with me, watched the first 10 minuted of class from the one-way mirrored observation room.  She loved pointing, "Sissy! Sissy! Sissy there!" giggling at me like we were sharing an inside joke.  Then I told Her to wave bye-bye, and we walked away. 
She waved slowly, brow furrowed.  Wait.  What's going on here?
And when we hit the parking lot- just us two- She fell to pieces.  She wailed and screamed.
"NO! Nonononoooo! SISSY! SIIISSSYYY!!!!!!"  writhing and struggling to get back inside.  She cried and whimpered for Sissy halfway home, sulked silently the rest of the way.  At home She refused to read stories.  "Sissy.  Want sissy booka."  After bribing Her with milk and cuddles, She read halfway through a story then cried again.  She went to bed still upset. 
As for me, I'm happy to say that Little One looked pretty content in Her circle, watching the other children closely, listening to the teacher intently.  Occasionally preening and arranging the skirt of the Fancy Dress.  Taking comfort in it, I think.  A silk suit of armor. I'm happy to see Her surrounded by future friends in a classroom bright and neat as a pin. 
I'm not happy that Missy cried and felt such as sting over having Her best friend yanked from Her.  I'm not happy that She threw a fit over it, either.  But I didn't scold Her.  After all, to tell you the truth, I know just how She feels.  In time it will be easier for all of us, as we get used to this new routine.  Missy and I will enjoy our quiet time together.  Little One will enjoy Her own world of friends and learning. 
I think we'll always be happy at pick-up time, though.