battle begun

SO today a scary thing happened. I went to the mall (scary enough) and I was looking for some PJ’s to wear in the hospital in the case that Little One ever decides to be born. I was thinking, childbirth is no excuse to not attempt cuteness! I will get myself some cute yet functional nightgown type thing and all the nurses will say “there goes a halfway decently dressed patient, right there”. I like to aspire to greatness. But then, the sales lady came over. She tricked me by looking all smiley and innocent, but then as she approached she got this very serious look in her eye. She spoke, with a tone that was both commanding and slightly scolding. And she picked up the most hideously frumpy, old-mother-hubbard looking nightgown and held it up to me and said “this is good for YOU. This is what you should be wearing. Here, take THIS one”. Ahhh! It has begun. From this moment on, I will have to fight the good fight against prarie nightgowns, hair scrunciis, and mom jeans. I’m counting on you, on ALL OF YOU to help me in this battle by never remaining silent if you see me veering, in a trancelike state, towards teal sweatpants with elastic at the bottoms. I expect you all, knowing that infants cause a mysterious affinity for amorphous clothing in cartoon-animal prints, to give me occasional updates on what is trendy, what is chic, and what belongs in a “Cathy” comic. And to kick me if I get out of line.
As for today, when I was quite on my own with out you all, my little warriors, I will have you know that I picked out a dress to wear in the hospital and I bought it and I took the tags off so that there is No Going Back. It is silk. And I’m pretty sure it’s meant to be a party dress. But I do not care. This is war, people.